The Shadow of the ‘Worry Monster’.

Sometimes, a little light is all you need…

When I started my blog a few years ago now, it was intended to be quite generalised. It was about pursuing the gentler path in life and concentrating on kindness and compassion, and I guess, the twists and turns we all experience in everyday life.  These topics are still close to my heart and I will write about them from time to time; life throws up all sorts of weird and wonderful things at us and there will always be new subjects to ponder on! Sometimes we need a bit of humour too to send us on our way!

One thing I have noticed, though, is the feedback that comes from my comments on anxiety. It seems, unfortunately, that many of us suffer from anxious times and there is a real need for ongoing support and backup for those battling with anxiety. Because of this I want to concentrate mainly on this topic for the foreseeable future.

If I can reach out to any of you who need support then I feel my words are doing their job. It’s amazing to think that with all the help at our disposal, we still need good, down to earth support. And it is ongoing. Anxious feeling may come and go. We are not suddenly cured from having unsettling feelings no matter how good the counsellors or the gurus we turn to. Sometimes, other occurrences in our lives just tip the balance between feeling ok to feeling unstable and miserable. Then, we can get despondent too and ask ourselves how we are going to cope with the latest situation that has cropped up. The lurking ‘worry monster’ is difficult to shake off. He doesn’t have much else to do but hover in the background. I feel sorry for him really – he doesn’t really have a life. You do! Once you meet him head on he will shrivel, trust me.

What we have to remember is this: ‘Sometimes, just a little bit of light is all you need’. We can take strength from so many places if we reach out and look for it. Be open. Be open to people – it makes a difference to how they treat you. Be honest. Say you aren’t feeling your best. Don’t give masses of detail. I find you don’t need to. Sometimes, less is more. Just tell who you are dealing with at the time that you aren’t having the best of days. You would be amazed how people can push aside their own ‘stuff’ and give you their kind attention. Most people are genuine and will do all they can to help you, but you have to give them a chance. Find your inner voice somehow. Be brave and help will come to you in spades.

I do appreciate that everyone has different issues going on. I have had a bereavement this week and it has taken all my power just to keep going. But I do keep going somehow. Going through the motions of everyday life helps. I say this countless times, but it does really help. However bad you feel (unless you are physically incapacitated) keep to the simple routines and try and get some things done, however small. It will help and give you a feeling of achievement when you can tick off a few things on your ‘to do’ list.

Funnily enough though, I will add this here: don’t worry too much about standards. This is something I struggle with. I have always felt appearances are important. Makeup on, hair done, house tidy, fridge full of food etc. But, here’s the thing. You can give in a bit! Let a few things go – it’s not the end of the world if you are not looking pristine! Friends may even quite like to see you not quite at your best, it shows you are human. I’m not talking totally let yourself go, but just cut yourself a bit of slack. Sop worrying what people think! They are busy with their own lives; they may love you but they still have their own stuff going on and they are not sitting there thinking you have gone to pot. (Unless you really have, in which case if they are a good friend they are on their way round right now!)

So this week I ask you to focus on this. You are loved. Honestly you are. You may be feeling bad but someone cares, really cares about you, even if you don’t feel it to be true. Get out a piece of paper. Doodle a bit. Make a pretty border. Leaves, bows, swirls, whatever. In the centre of the paper, write this is your best handwriting : ‘You are loved’. Use some coloured pencils if you have them. Be fancy. Then put your picture in a prominent place and look at if often. I promise you, it will help.


So, this week. Leave the ‘worry monster’out in the cold. Do not feed him no matter how much he badgers you! Whatever is going on, if you feel bad, talk to someone who cares. Or look up online help sites if you need to. Or see your doctor if you are worried about anything. Ask and it will be given.

     ‘When the north wind blows, And your world is grey, My friendly heart hears all you say. Call my name, In your darkest night, I’ll find a way to bring you light. And if your world Is tumbling down, I’ll wrap you in a cosy gown. I’ll feed you soup , And bring you wine, For your life is a part of mine’. 

                                       (C) Lyn Halvorsen

The Love of a Good Friend

I’m been thinking about friendship this week. Love and friendship.

Friendship comes in so many guises. Most of us have friends we see regularly; those who share a large part of our lives and know us inside out. If we are lucky, we have partners who are our soul mates; we can finish their sentences, know what they are thinking without having to ask, and indeed would not wish to imagine life without them. Sometimes we have friends we only see perhaps once a year, perhaps because they are a distance away, yet we immediately pick up where we left off when we do see them.

Our friends are there for us when times are hard, and we are there for them.

There are friends too, who we have just met, and there are some waiting in the wings. Tonight we dinned on a delicious, organically grown squash, given to us by a new friend who had grown it and harvested it for us. Roasted gently with a sprinkling of turmeric, we could almost taste the love that had nurtured it.

I like to think we all have a friend we can rely on. Sometimes, though, we need extra special help. When that north wind blows and we need sheltering for a while, it’s surprising how help can appear just when we least expect it.

‘Be not forgetful to entertain strangers, for in doing so some have entertained angels                   unawares.’


A Friend Indeed

I was standing by the window
Staring out to space
Wondering if I could find a friend
To stop me feeling out of place.
Then out of nowhere you appeared
With your jolly point of view,
Taking life so lightly
That I believed in you.

I don’t know where you came from;
Were you just out of sight
Like the sun, waiting behind the clouds
To dazzle me with light?
You seemed to gather my sadness,
And discard it, like a cloak
I’d never need to wear again,
With one uplifting stroke.

You gave me help to find my way
To somewhere I belong,
Gave me your time, just like a gift
I’d waited for so long.
I don’t know where you came from
But you changed my point of view;
Your heart is surely golden
And I believe in you.

© Lyn Halvorsen

My Friendly Heart

When the north wind blows
And your world is grey,
My friendly heart
Hears all you say.
Call my name
In your darkest night
I’ll find a way
To bring you light.
And if your world
Is tumbling down,
I’ll wrap you
In a fleecy gown,
Feed you soup
And bring you wine,
For your life is
A part of mine.

© Lyn Halvorsen

Angel blessings

Blessings to you.

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